If you are a young christian male and your answer to the question “Have you struggled with/are you struggling with pornography?” is “Yes” (mine is), then pull up a chair for a little discuss. If you are a young christian male and haven’t struggled with it, grab a chair as well. Personal experience can be costly. Let us pretend this doesn’t affect the ladies.

Have you noticed that we live in a sexually-charged and pornographic culture? There’s a default level of pornography thrown at us everyday. It seems unconscious/subconscious but if you really think about it, we’re just being desensitized, and things that used to bother us, that should bother us, have over time, become normal. I’m not trying to explain sin away. Someone did say rightly “Seduction is not when you’re enticed to do something you don’t want to do. Seduction is when you are enticed to do something you secretly want to do.” It is because this is true that we need to be deliberate about what we allow to take root in our hearts and minds.

It’s in the movies we see. Have you noticed that it is easy to watch an adult scene in a movie (E.g Spartacus, GOT) and rave about how cool the movie is, but feel really shy to tell someone you saw a video on pornhub?

It’s in the songs we listen to. Lyrically sexually explicit songs, you can play them in your car while going for a drive with your fellowship members, but you need earphones when visiting an adult site. It’s in the music videos too. You can twerk in a music video and I will nod my head to the rhythm. I may even have my parents in the same room and it’s still okay (Yes, I may shift uncomfortably the first couple of times – but afterwards, it’s just a music video please).  But when it is clearly labeled as 18+ in Adult site, you prefer to go to the bathroom.

It’s in the books and magazines we read. Do you remember when we hide James Hardley Chase books and Mills and Boon books in a newspaper before reading them? Then tuck them away from prying eyes under the mattress? Yeah, there are shelves of such books, rebranded though, in Christian bookstores. Readers will know this that usually as you read a book, somehow, you are painting a picture of what the characters will look like if it were a movie. Even more so with erotic books. You have a BluRay, high def picture that YOU created in your mind. All you need is clay and the power that comes with ‘Let there be…’ and it is done.

Oh, and it’s definitely on social media. Just double-click on that picture on instagram. Sure, she is erotically dressed, and with half an imagination, she could be stark nude in my mind, but what’s it to me? I am not a pervert. It doesn’t even bother me anymore that people can see that I liked a raunchy picture. But I will clear my browser history when I visit some sites in the bathroom. That one, nobody can know.

Have you visited a public swimming pool recently?

Surely, you see the desensitization at play. Some of you have visited an adult site lately, or played that video hidden in your phone for your eyes only. And you have identified this as a problem, but while you’re trying to solve the issue, you are not trying to get back to ground zero, you are trying to get back to the default baseline the culture has set, which will still take you back to where you’re coming from. Kings, you owe it to God, yourself and a lot of people to maintain sexual purity.

How radical are you willing to go to respond to God’s love? How far are you willing to go to be the King your wife deserves? Do you know that pornography and masturbation can make you not enjoy sexual intimacy with your wife more thoroughly?…the unrealistic expectations and low sexual stamina. Do you know that if you are not more deliberate and radical, the time will come when you are to serve as Prophet and Priest and Protector in your home, but your children will tell you they are going to the movies in the cinema (and you know it’s a pornographic movie showing) and you ask if they have money for guguru?

Kings, I can’t pretend that this is easy. Going counter culture is swimming against the tide. YOU WILL FALL A COUPLE OF TIMES. Get back on the altar and die again…and again, and again, and again. It is in death, that you will find life. If you are already visiting adult sites, there’s this cool app called Blocker X on playstore. Subscribe and talk to a friend. You will need a code that will be sent to that friends email before you can access some contents.

I will like to hear from you about this topic. Are there more ways not listed up here that our culture desensitizes us? Do you have issues you want to discuss? You can send a message directly to me through this Blog message or just mail to kanayo_ikeh@yahoo.com. You can also leave a comment under if privacy is not an issue for you. I confess that I am not equipped to handle this issue with christian ladies (or that I even want to), but I have a lady friend with whom you can exchange a couple of messages. Reach out and I will link you up.

It’s a slow fade when you give yourself away. It’s a slow fade when black and white are turned to gray. And thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid when you give yourself away. People never crumble in a day…it’s a slow fade. Casting Crowns

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In another news, welcome to February, my best month of the year, the month I celebrate love. Not because of valentine’s day (If I had my way, people putting on red on Feb 14th will be sterilized), but because of February the 12th! I would explain why I particularly celebrate love on that day in a blog entry. Watch this space. Cheers!